4: What Does Singing Have to Do with Self-Worth?
Heather Maîr Thomas 
Insights connecting voice, identity, and self-permission. Sharing how many of us silence ourselves in more ways than one.
As a child growing up, I never thought about whether my voice was 'good enough'. Singing was simply something people did. It was as natural as breathing in my family
My grandfather conducted choirs, was chapel organist and played in local bands. I grew up hearing harmony in chapels and around family tables. Nobody needed permission to sing.
But as I grew older and moved into more formal adult life, I noticed how many people believed their voice didn’t belong. The singing they may have once enjoyed playfully as children had been silenced by criticism, embarrassment, in having to inhabit quiet spaces or the unspoken rule that only 'talented' people should sing.
And with that silence, something deeper often takes root - a sense of not being enough.
That’s why, when I work with adult beginners, I don’t just help them sing, I help them rebuild trust in their sense of self-worth.
When Confidence Is Silenced
A single comment - 'Don’t sing so loudly,' 'You’re out of tune,' or 'You’re not really musical' — can live in someone’s mind for decades.
These experiences might seem small from the outside, but they often land as proof that our voice, and by extension, our presence - isn’t wanted.
The result? We hold back. We doubt. We stay quiet. And not just in song, but in conversation, in decisions, and in how we relate to ourselves.
Your Voice Reflects How You See Yourself
Our voice is one of our most personal instruments. It emerges from within us, shaped by breath, emotion, thought and memory. It is our primary form of communication.
So when we silence it, or shrink it, or constantly apologise for it, we’re often echoing deeper beliefs: I’m not good enough. I’m too much. I shouldn’t take up space.
But singing can be self-advocacy - it can be a quiet, personal act of reclaiming. Every hum, every breath, every note, even whispered and unsure - is a reminder that you are allowed to exist, to express, to take up space.
The Bridge Between Singing and Speaking
That’s why I created two complementary offerings: *Permission to Sing* and *The Gentle Art of Speaking Up*.
*Permission to Sing* gently reconnects you with your voice through sound and breath. *The Gentle Art of Speaking Up* is an introduction to assertiveness, it supports you in finding calm, confident ways to express yourself in everyday life.
Both are grounded in the belief that your voice matters — and that self-worth can be restored, one breath at a time.
You Deserve to Be Heard
You don’t need to sound perfect. You don’t need to say it flawlessly. You just need a space where your voice is welcome.
That’s what I’ve tried to create, in both courses, a return to the ease and connection I grew up with, offered gently and without judgement.
Because when you reconnect with your voice, you begin to reconnect with yourself!
I invite you to explore these mini courses and take the first step back to your voice - and your ability to take your place.
Let me know how you get on!
Oll and gwella
Heather
[The Gentle Art of Speaking Up]
Categories: : BEGINNERS, PERMISSION TO SING
